I have so much homework I still have to do. I've been ignoring it. And I really need to go buy my math book. I was hoping that I could either A. buy the linear algebra book, copy all the assignments and return it with the receipt or B. go there every day and hide in the bookstore while copying assignments. It is not worth it to pay $80 for something we're using for two weeks. But I deemed both those things unethical...
College books are so overpriced! I know I'm constantly complaining about that, but it doesn't stop being true in-between my complaints!
The school is conveniently eliminating early period next year. Have I ranted about that yet? It means I either can't take chem 2 or I can't take science seminar (which is one of the classes I really want to take). It seems that in this last crunch of high school I can't take anything I really want to (thanks to the stupid math class which requires three periods... another thing about college- it should conform to high school schedules!). The one class I have always looked forward to is creative writing. Now I can't take it. And I can't take studies in science fiction either. I can only take government and English and chemistry and math and all of the usual. Nothing I really want to take (although it would be a lie to say I'm not excited about multi-variable calculus).
Today I am being lazy again. But I'm going to the humane society at 2. Hopefully I will not be severely wounded by another psycho dog this time. I love those dogs though. They are all so innocent really.
I've been attempting to think (something that never goes well over spring break). I'm trying to understand why I'm so paranoid of letting people in. I guess I'm afraid that if people really know me, they won't like me. There are too many horrible qualities about me. And also, I know that I always have hurt the people I care about. I'm so sick of hurting people. But if there are always walls, no one will ever know me.
I'm reading another good book about Latin American history, In the Name of Salome. And I must confess I find Latin American history far more interesting than American history. The only politically out of the ordinary things that have happened in our history is that periodically some crazy, racist third party attempts to seize Congress and fails. Nothing that I'm encouraging constant revolution and guerilla warfare, but it is quite a bit more interesting than having ten chapters in a row about America was sliding gradually into consumerism and affluence.
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"What I realized suddenly was that the true failure would have been if I hadn't given a damn. You can bandage a wound, set a broken bone, but not caring...you can't cure that and you can't recover from it."
"What I realized suddenly was that the true failure would have been if I hadn't given a damn. You can bandage a wound, set a broken bone, but not caring...you can't cure that and you can't recover from it."
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About Me
- Lindsay
- Everything in my life is about to change, and I'm absolutely terrified. I breathe one instant at a time.
1 comment:
about school: take what you want to take. screw chem II. you don't need it. science sem is awesome. understanding science fiction is awesome. take something you want to take and take as little as possible. your college class will be nice, because on the days you don't have it you get those three periods free. (and they give so much time becuase you have to travel to and from carroll). believe me, that is one of the nicest things about my senior year. looking back on it all, i wish i had taken creative writing and photo. it would have been well worth the reduction in the number of science credits i have. you probably think you have take certain classes for college purposes. that is only true for government and english. frankly, they are not going to care if you take a writing class instead of a second year of chem. it will not look negative, and they will impressed enough by everything you have done for the past four years. so do what you want to do.
it's crazy.... what you say about the fear that if people really knew you they wouldn't like you. that used to be my mantra. and it simply is not true.putting that wall in place does you no favors. look at the people who do know you, even the worst parts of you, but love you regardless. it's becuase you are a beautiful person, and the negative things you believe about yourself do not define you.
latin american history is super neat. although, i have to say us is history is interesting at least in some parts. i especially like labor history and latin/south american relations. shea will scoff, but read howard zinn.....
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